I was raised by a feminist mother. I remember when I was 13 years old that this new writer by the name of "Andrea Dworkin" was publishing some of her very influential works for the first time. I remember how disappointed I was in my single mother that she believed in Dworkin's ideas about men. I was just entering into adolesence and I realised I could be in a tight spot trying to grow up and become a man when my mother was somehow subscribing to all these really odd ideas about the nature of men.

I just finished a really rollicking debate about Dworkin's polemics over on a link sharing site I frequent a lot called reddit.

I take issue with the kind of stereotypes, hatred, hyperbole, and sexism which Dworkin sought to infuse the study of gender relations with. A case in point is this very fascinating chapter by her.

I see Dworkin as being very much in error, because she is trying to say that analogies represent proof. I would answer those models, with a simple overview of what I see in the problems that the West has when it comes to our gender relations.

Here in a nutshell, is that overview - which I penned, in order to reply to my conversation partner at reddit:

___________

OK... I see where you're coming from now. You adhere to that very standard conception of gender relations that has become so common in the West, in recent decades.

So now I have a point of reference to work with here, when discussing this with you. That makes me feel better.

In my estimation of things, to attribute all these negative things to men is a very sexist thing to do. And it's a very hurtful form of sexism... as hurtful as racism is, when expressed against ethnic minorities. These kinds of stereotypes, when internalised by the stigmatised group, can lead people to get stuck, to where they lose their ability to change the things that they're doing wrong. The banter at reddit is a prime example of how self-hating young men talk with eachother.

The fact that men take up leadership positions more often than women honestly is solely a result of the choices that people make in their lives. I was talking to a young woman on reddit the other day about this problem we have in our society where a large number of young women wish to marry men with a decade more life experience than they have. This leads to a social dynamic in our society between the genders which reflects this maturity gap within these marriages.

Being expected to take a leadership position when you're not ready to do so, is not a fun thing. I have been promoted to a managerial position a time or two in work situations. And I have discovered that there is a curse associated with being in a leadership position. It's that you make mistakes. And the mistakes you make have consequences for those you have power over. And those who suffer from your mistakes have every right to lambast you. But this effect occurs, no matter who is in those positions of authority. It is not a male problem. It's a problem that's always going to occur whenever there are leaders.

It's interesting to study cultures where women are in charge - there are some old silent monochrome documentary films, for example, which show the social dynamics in the Hopi and Navajo tribes. One sees that in a society where women are expected to take the leadership roles, the genders actually switch personalities. Women get these masculine personality attributes - they show stress in their body language, they become overbearing. Men appear more gentle, and meek. Another more modern example of this can be seen by studying the personality of New Zealand's Helen Clark - who just finished nine years as prime minister there.

I insist that women would make as many errors as men would in leadership positions... if we were to see a change over a long period of time where women were to be expected to be self sufficient and take leadership roles, and men would be expected to look for a cougar to marry when they turn 18. However, I agree that there would be a progressive transition period - because people who bring a new perspective to a field, can often initially solve a lot of problems. But there's nothing innately sour about men, or innately good about women - that was a big error Dworkin made as she portrayed the genders.